O’Leary showed up at Mass one Sunday and the priest almost fell down when he saw him. O’Leary had never been seen in church in his life.
After Mass, the priest caught O’Leary and said “O’Leary, I am so glad you decided to come to Mass, what made you come?”
O’Leary said, “I got to be honest with you Father, a while back, I misplaced my hat and I really, really love that hat. I know that Shaunassy had one just like mine and I knew that Shaunassy came to church every Sunday. I also knew that Shaunassy had to take off his hat during Mass, and I figured he would leave it in the back of church. So,
I was going to leave after Communion and steal Shaunassy’s hat.”
The priest said, “Well, O’Leary, I notice that you didn’t steal Shaunassy’s hat. What changed your mind?”
O’Leary said “Well, after I heard your sermon on the 10 commandments, I decided that I didn’t need to steal Shaunassy’s hat.”
The priest gave O’Leary a big smile and said “After I talked about Thou Shall Not Steal, you decided you would rather do without your hat than burn in Hell, right?”
O’Leary shook his head and said “No, Father, after you talked about Thou Shall Not Commit Adultery; I remembered where I left my hat!”